Karl Edwards presents Working Matters

Tag: confrontation

  • Loving Monday: Addressing One Problem… Today

    loving_monday

    The great thing about Monday morning is that we get to begin our week any way we choose.

    We can choose our attitudes, we can choose our priorities, we can choose what will get our attention and what we will avoid.

    Problems, more often than not, fall into the category of what we choose to avoid.

    I‘d like to suggest that for this Monday morning, we each select a problem we will address.

    Very few of us love problems or look forward to confronting them. Problems, though, exist no matter what we might feel about them.

    The opportunity we have here on Monday morning is to begin the week differently.

    What is one difficult issue, recurring problem, or awkward relationship that you have been avoiding?

    Have been avoiding up until now, that is.

    While addressing a problem may be an unpleasant, awkward, and difficult experience, at least you got it over with. You are now on the road to building a different way forward.

    As long as the problem is avoided, though, it is still hanging over your head, lurking in the shadows, laying like an unexploded land mine upon which you or someone else will eventually step.

    It’s your choice, of course. Would you rather do the difficult work of diffusing the bomb or the difficult work of recovering from its explosion?

    This Monday, let’s try diffusing one difficult issue so we can spend the rest of the week building a constructive way forward.

    What issue will you choose?

    On your side,

    – Karl Edwards

    Loving Monday is a weekly column designed to encourage us to step into our weeks with an intention to show up authentically, engage fully, and choose to make it a good week for ourselves. Explore past columns here.

  • Listen In -> Bridging the Work-Faith Divide #4: Collaboration, Empowerment and Accountability

    We don’t work alone.

    Some of may wish we worked alone, but reality returns each morning and we find ourselves face to face with another task on which to collaborate, another meeting to schedule, or another disagreement to work through.

    Bridging the Work-Faith DivideWe need ways to share information, combine efforts, enhance motivation, and be accountable to achieve results.

    In this week’s show, Claudia and I discuss how our faith informs how we work with other people.

    But, true to our the workplace perspective of this series, we are not going to ask how to be a good Christian at work. We are going to discuss the workplace realities of collaboration, empowerment and accountability.

    We have to share tasks and pool our skills; we have to tap into people’s core motivations and working styles; and we need to be able to confront problems and achieve results.

    You’ll be amazed at how relevant and helpful being a person of faith is to effectively navigating these common workplace issues.

    Listen in.

    Just now joining the conversation? Catch up on the entire series here.
    Interested in how we can resource your church or organization? Get more information here.

  • Listen In -> Confrontation for Those Who Don’t Like Confrontation #5: Clearing Up Misunderstandings

    There’s a story of an elderly couple who were sitting outside on their front porch listening to the sounds of the countryside one evening.

    The gentleman was listening to the crickets in the field behind the house. The woman was listening to the choir in the church down the lane.

    At one point the woman exclaimed to her husband, “Isn’t that beautiful?!”

    “Ah yes,” he replied. “And I understand they do it by rubbing their legs together.”

    Misunderstandings happen.

    In this week’s show, Claudia and I discuss the common reality of miscommunicating, misinterpreting, and other ways we get our wires crossed.

    How often do we find ourselves getting all worked up over some perceived slight only to find out later that the other person was merely distracted by something completely unrelated?

    How often do we find ourselves jumping to conclusions about a slipping project schedule only to discover that we didn’t know the parties involved had agreed to rearrange the order of events and everything was right on track?

    Misunderstandings happen. The question is, are we alert enough and responsive enough to confront them (i.e. talk calmly about) early on before they have a chance to spiral out of control?

    Listen in.

    Just now joining the conversation? Catch up on the entire series here.

  • Listen In -> Confrontation for Those Who Don’t Like Confrontation #4: Not Pulling One’s Weight

    It happens all the time. People go on vacation, get sick, have personal emergencies, and experience the occasional “bad day.”

    We are not always able “pull our weight,” so to speak.

    When life happens and someone on the team cannot pull their weight we are usually more than willing to pitch in and fill the gap. And that’s a good thing.

    BUT…

    And it’s a big but!

    When someone consistently and chronically does not do their job, our willingness to fill the gap should drop like a lead balloon.

    We are not helping anymore when we participate with an under-performer in preventing there being any consequences to their inadequate contribution. Our filling the gap that was a good thing for the team on an occasional basis becomes a bad thing when it becomes a pattern.

    They are simply not doing the job they agreed to do. And we are no longer giving our all to the job we agreed to do.

    In this week’s show, Claudia and I discuss how to talk calmly about (i.e. confront) someone not pulling their weight.

    Listen in.

    Just now joining the conversation? Catch up on the entire series here.

  • Listen In -> Confrontation for Those Who Don’t Like Confrontation #3: Unacceptable Work

    Let’s face it, even on the best of teams there are times when someone’s work is unacceptable.

    It’s going to happen. It’s a workplace reality. All the training in the world cannot eliminate these instances of below-standard quality, timeliness, accuracy, thoroughness or judgment.

    In this week’s conversation, Claudia and I discuss how to talk calmly about (i.e. confront) unacceptable work.

    We don’t have to act like parents scolding a wayward child. We don’t have to act like betrayed slavemasters punishing those beneath us. We don’t have to act like apologetic nursemaids afraid to create a new problem where we are trying to fix a current one.

    When the normal and the ordinary happen, like unacceptable work, then a straightforward and work-focused conversation needs to take place.

    Listen in.

    Just now joining the conversation? Catch up on the entire series here.

  • Listen In -> Confrontation for Those Who Don’t Like Confrontation #2: Inappropriate Behavior

    Awkward.

    Offensive.

    Destructive.

    Some people seem to live as if they’re the only ones on the planet.

    They are oblivious or insensitive to how their behavior affects others.

    How then do we communicate that their actions or words hurt, offend or harm us?

    Suffice to say that waiting until you blow up in an explosion of rage is not very effective.

    What is appropriate when confronting the inappropriate?

    This week Claudia discuss confronting inappropriate behavior in the workplace.

    Listen in.

    Just now joining the conversation? Catch up on the entire series here.

  • Listen In -> Confrontation for Those Who Don’t Like Confrontation #1: Making Confrontation Normal

    Granted confrontation will probably never be anyone’s favorite task.

    What, though, if confrontation were a mere ordinary, matter-of-fact, and mundane task? Just another workplace reality whenever diverse people and complex systems overlap. Ho hum.

    Could fear and anger be making confrontation more difficult and dangerous than it really need be?

    Join Claudia and I as we begin a new discussion series entitled, Confrontation for Those Who Don’t Like Confrontation.

    Maybe we simply need to change our vocabulary. Instead of “confrontation” we could call it, “talking about difficult issues,” “informing others of your boundaries,” or “clearing up misunderstandings.”

    Problems are to be expected in the workplace. Confrontation should be a normal and dispassionate form of communication that takes place more often than not. Confrontation should be a helpful and constructive activity not a scary or dangerous one. Confrontation should help us work through our problems earlier and more effectively rather than letting them fester and compound.

    Confrontation for Those Who Don’t Like Confrontation
    Week #1: Making Confrontation Normal
    Week #2: Confronting Inappropriate Behavior
    Week #3: Confronting Unacceptable Work
    Week #4: Confronting Not Pulling One’s Weight
    Week #5: Confronting Misunderstandings

    How do you feel about confrontation?

    Listen in.

  • Question of the Week #14

    What important issue are you tip-toeing around?

    The Question of the Week is offered to increase awareness of one’s personal leadership practices and encourage experimentation with creative alternatives.

  • Quote to Consider: Churchill on Appeasement

    quote-to-consider“Appeasement is throwing someone else to the crocodiles in the hopes of being eaten last.”

    Winston Churchill

  • Listen In -> Faking Authenticity #3: When Wanting to Confront

    I don’t know anyone who loves confrontation. Do you?

    Work life, though, is filled with situations where something or someone needs to be confronted.

    Confrontation is one of the most common situations where we feel we need to be someone we’re not.

    We put on a “fake nice” to head off a negative response, or we cop a “fake stern” to show we mean business.

    Could it be we don’t trust how we’ll show up in a complicated situation if we are simply ourselves?

    In this week’s show, Claudia and I look at faking authenticity in situations of confrontation.

    Listen in.