It is the race to offer the most insubstantial napkin.

Only a few months ago it seemed the napkin dispenser norm was a semi-absorbent sheet of paper folded once in half in one direction and then again in thirds in the other.

The first feature to get left behind was absorbency. In fact, absorbency is but a distant memory, isn’t it?! But that loss was easy to cover up under the guise of protecting the environment. That it now takes five napkins to wipe up what one used to suffice for is conveniently not mentioned.

Next to go was the full sheet folded in half. Clearly we had been over-cleaning ourselves after our burger and fries. Some executive most certainly gave themself a big salary increase for finding such a clever way to cut their paper costs in half.

More recently it seems the tri-fold is increasingly being ditched in favor of a single fold. (And a fold that isn’t even a full half fold at that.)

It’s amazing how little paper these executives feel is more than adequate to deal with grease, coffee, ketchup, or whatever else one might want to wipe off one’s hands.

Who do you feel is winning the race to offer the most insubstantial napkin? Leave a comment with your example. Let’s compare notes. 

More significantly, where are your cost-cutting efforts inadvertently resulting in something like the need to use five insubstantial napkins instead of just one nice absorbent one?

To revel in our victories or stew in our defeats is to overlook the ever-moving hands on the clock.

We cling to the past at our own peril.

Here on the last day of the year, we pause to say good-bye to 2011.

For some of us it was a year of heartbreak, unemployment and/or assaults on our health.

For some of us it was a year of discovery, achievement and/or new beginnings.

Here on the last day of the year we pause to both give thanks and to learn.

In order to move boldly into the new year we need to do both, give thanks and learn.

Both getting stuck in the past or relying on the past are mistakes that can cost us dearly going into the future.

Giving thanks helps us put our triumphs and tragedies into perspective so that we don’t give them too much power over us either in blind over-confidence or paralyzing fear.

Learning allows us to leverage and transform our gains and losses into something that will resource and fuel our future.

Good-bye 2011. We pause to give thanks and learn from you.

Tomorrow we greet the new year. Stronger and wiser we will build on what has gone before.

Tomorrow we begin anew.

The weekend is upon us. Or is it?

You may have already left the office. Or have you?

Just a friendly reminder to make your weekend a weekend.

I like playing cards with friends and will be doing so later this evening. I let down, relax, and thoroughly enjoy the company and competition.

What activity or lack of activity helps you relax and let down after a busy week?

We all need our weekend.

The mind needs a break. The body needs a break. Our souls need a break.

When we keep pushing all of the time, our capacity to continue at the same levels of effectiveness diminishes and diminishes.

Not only do we become less effective in the short term, we deplete and exhaust ourselves in the long term.

So do yourself a favor this weekend and give yourself a weekend.

Gather the friends for cards or games. Get out on the golf course or the frisbee golf course. Spend a day at the beach, in the mountains, or at the lake. Curl up with a good book. Try cooking something new. Build something with your hands.

Whatever you end up doing, please, on behalf of all of us who have to face you on Monday, make your weekend a weekend!

On your side,

- Karl Edwards

I asked that they credit back $40 worth of disputed fees that arose from me mis-navigating a poorly designed web site.

But no. They’d rather take the chance on me taking my business elsewhere.

But no. They’d rather I telephone their call center and take the salaried and benefit-laden time of one of their customer representatives for any need I have in the future instead of using their web site ever again.

For $40 worth of incorrectly incurred fees, they could have secured a happy long-term customer.

Instead they would rather risk losing $65/month for the next however many years. Instead they would rather discourage usage of their web site and encourage the use of their live call centers, whatever their recorded on-hold messages say to the contrary.

So beware. Any mistake you make on their intentionally misleading web site will be your fault.

So beware. Any fees you inadvertently incur by trusting the misleading online instructions are your responsibility to notice and notify them about before a billing cycle passes its arbitrary mid-month date.

No one at Verizon can help you. No one at Verizon has the authority to do anything after a billing cycle has passed.

No one at Verizon has it in their job description to improve the system, or to receive a suggestion, or to care about the systemic craziness of spending thousands of dollars on salaries to do what a well-designed web site could accomplish, or to spend $40 once in order to continue receiving $65/month indefinitely.

I have some thinking to do about what I am going to do now that I know that Verizon has a sub-line of services making money on the errors of their customers.

Last I heard, your customers were your clients, not your victims.

Verizon seems to be making money, though. Maybe we should all try to cheat our customers at every turn and blame them for the privilege.

I think I’m done with my venting.

As for you, though. Beware.

You might be participating in a family business. Maybe a friend recruited you. You needed a paycheck and grabbed something that pays the bills. You wanted the prestige that goes with your profession. You chose to climb the corporate ladder to get the responsibilities, pay, and status that goes with doing so. You are trying to finance a certain lifestyle. Someone once told you that you would be good at this sort of work.

What is your story?

In particular, and the focus of this morning’s reflection, how much choice did you have in the matter?

Was it the only job that was available? Would any other choice have felt demeaning or less prestigious? Were you responding to family expectations? Were you competing with peers? Were you desperate for any paying work? Were you protecting your job security?

Whether we feel free or trapped is a huge factor in shaping how we deal with situations at work. Especially all that is complicated and unpleasant in our jobs!

If we feel free (i.e. we chose our situation and feel we have a choice about whether or not we will stay in our situation), we are much more likely to be able to roll with, deal with, and/or confront people, problems, and complications at work.

If we feel trapped (i.e. we don’t have a choice, don’t have any power, or don’t have any options), we are much more likely to

Here’s the rub. Just because you don’t have certain alternatives available to you doesn’t mean that there are no alternatives at all. Just because you don’t have the power to change a particular policy, pattern or person, doesn’t mean that you don’t have any power whatsoever.

In other words, the feeling of being trapped is only partially based on the difficult realities of your situation.

Once we realize that we have forms of power, resources for change, alternatives, and choices that we don’t currently see and maybe have not yet even imagined, our experience of our difficult realities begins to change.

We begin to become one of those people who find a way to roll with, deal with, and/or confront the people, problems and complications they encounter at work. We begin to feel free.

How did you end up in your current situation? How much choice do you feel you had in getting there?

It can be the difference between feeling free or trapped.

If you are having trouble seeing any choices or alternatives in your situation, it’s time for us to talk!

On your side,

- Karl Edwards

It’s common and not an entirely bad thing to want to make the “right” decision instead of the “wrong” decision.

We all want our decisions to be validated in the crucible of reality.

But it is fallacious to assume either that there are only two alternatives (the right one or the wrong one), or that the reason that some decisions don’t work out has to do with a fatal flaw in the original decision.

Let’s take the two problems one at a time.

First, that there is a “right” decision to be made and all other decisions are flatly “wrong”.

This either-or, blank-and-white thinking is naive at best if not outright dangerous.

Instead of a fork in the road, imagine a chess board. There are many possible moves to make. There are multiple strategies one might select and/or switch between. There is also another player involved who is making decisions with varying degrees of precision, shrewdness and finesse of their own.

Imagine then an (as yet not invented) eight-person chess game with an octagonal gigantic chess board. Multiple decision-makers and multiple dynamics resulting in an infinite array of possible outcomes.

Imagine now that it is your turn to make your next move. What will you choose? What decision will you make?

I hope it is obvious that there is no possible way to believe any longer that there is one “right” decision you must find that will assure eventual victory.

On what basis then will you make your next decision? Here decision-making becomes as much art as it is science.

The second assumption was that the failure of a decision to work out is proof that the “wrong” decision was made.

Again, we are confronted with the complex nature of reality with its many participants, multi-faceted dynamics, and environmental factors outside of our control.

That a decision does not work out does not mean it was not the best decision at the time. It means that other factors are at work, and we need to adjust accordingly.

Those fixated on judging decisions as either “right” or “wrong” are not paying attention to the next decision they need to make. They are not flexible enough to allow for adjustments along the way, because they have just proven to themselves that they or someone else is a bad decision-maker.

What about you?

What gets your attention when trying to make a decision?

If your field of vision is filled with a stark fork in the road demanding that you figure out which path is correct, you will approach your decision radically different than if you see a chess board demanding you make your next move among many.

On your side,

- Karl Edwards

No wonder our investments in building each are so paltry.

It is sad but true.

This inability to trust others with the truth covers myriad facets of work life. The truth about company finances, the truth about impending lay-offs, the truth about promotion prospects, the truth about changing deadlines, the truth about management planning… and the list goes on.

Today I want to focus on the unfortunate reality that so many leaders cannot tell you the truth about you.

FACT: Everyone has strengths, skills, talents and abilities. Therefore there is always something to affirm, empower and reward about everyone on the team.

FACT: Everyone is imperfect, learning, makes mistakes, chokes, falters, and fails on occasion. Therefore there is always room for constructive confrontation.

If leaders could tell people the truth about themselves, they would never be at a loss for extending compliments, expanding responsibilities or extending rewards. At the same time, in the ordinary course of events, leaders would be pointing out areas for improvement, countering mistaken thinking, and confronting unacceptable behavior.

If leaders could tell people the truth. But most can’t.

We could analyze why so many leaders are loath to either extend compliments or confront problems, but I want to focus on what we can do. What you and I can do.

We can tell ourselves the truth about ourselves.

If others can’t, then we need to be able to give ourselves this crucial gift.

Let’s go back to our two core facts. Everyone has something valuable to contribute, and everyone is imperfect and fails occasionally.

Can you identify for yourself what you bring to the table?

• What are five attributes about yourself which add significant value to your work?
• List three ways you are wonderfully distinct from everyone else on the team.
• For which achievements over the past three months are you most proud? Over the past year?

Don’t be shy. Don’t be modest. Tell yourself the truth.

You may be the only person who does!

Can you identify for yourself where you need to grow, improve, learn, or make corrections?

• What tasks or people do you tend to avoid? Reflect on why that might be the case.
• Over which subjects or tasks do others tend to avoid you or complain about you? Again reflect on where there may be substance.
• On which topics do you find yourself feeling either the most personally defensive or the most critical of others?

Don’t be afraid. To be imperfect is simply a fact, not a judgment. Tell yourself the truth.

Again, you may be the only person who does!

Telling yourself the truth about your strengths and achievements will keep you grounded and encouraged about your intrinsic value to the team.

Telling yourself the truth about your weaknesses and failures will keep you grounded and sober about your ongoing need to continually learn, improve and grow.

Both are good things. Both are true things you tell yourself to great benefit. Both are things you need to tell yourself until more leaders learn how to tell the truth.

Tell yourself the truth about you.

On your side,

- Karl Edwards

Loving Monday is a weekly column designed to encourage us to step into our weeks with an intention to show up authentically, engage fully, and choose to make it a good week for ourselves. Explore past columns here.

Not only is it a lot of fun (yes, I have indulged), the combination of a clean desk and the catharsis of acting out so dramatically makes for a powerful attitude boost.

A bit impractical you figure, until, of course, you realize that your piles could not become any less organized on the floor than they are already on top of your desk.

After prudently removing breakable items like the computer, telephone, and paper-clip sculpture your son made for you, plant your feet firmly, hold your back erect, and lift the desk to that precise angle where the mountains of paper go careening onto the floor.

As you set your perfectly clean desk down and settle back into your chair, you will notice that those unseemly mounds now lie conveniently out of view.

After reacquainting yourself with its sleek, smooth surface, step around the desk, select one item from the “differently organized” piles on the floor, and return to your seat to enjoy an uncluttered, focused effort.

On your side,

- Karl Edwards

Cheryl Smith hosts a wonderful blog over at CultureSmith. If you aren’t a regular visitor start today.

Today’s post is in response to her “The Simplify Journey” column and call for contributions.

Join the conversation.

Are we becoming too cynical? Or are we merely laughing at our own failings?

The problem with how we traditionally approach New Year’s resolutions is that it’s such an all-or-nothing affair.

Most of us set an ambitious goal for ourselves. So far so good. It’s helpful to have a goal and for that goal to be specific.

But then we articulate the goal as an all-or-nothing proposition. In other words the only two options available are to keep it entirely or to fail it utterly.

“I will lose 15 pounds.” “I will keep my desk clean.” “I will stop calling the Trojan fans I work with demeaning names… however much they may deserve it.”

Instead of setting yourself an ambitious New Year’s resolution this year, try building one.

When building something, you always have what you have constructed so far even if you do not have everything you set out to build. In other words, there is progress along the way that can be observed and celebrated, even if the building isn’t yet complete.

You could choose to reduce the amount and frequency of sweets you eat little by little. You could begin cleaning your desk by sorting your mail as soon as you get it. You could extend small, if superficial, compliments to your Trojan co-workers like, “I’ll bet USC wins their bowl game this year… Oh… That’s right… They aren’t going to a bowl game this year.”

The point is that you’re making a start. A real start. A concrete start. Even if a small start.

Change takes place slowly. Change takes place incrementally. New Year’s Resolutions that are worded as change that can take place incrementally over longer periods of time will have a much greater likelihood of success.

Success can be experienced as progress along the way instead of an all-or-nothing pass/fail at the end.

Make this the year of building your New Year’s Resolution.

On your side,

- Karl Edwards